Today I was talking on the phone to a dear friend who just had a baby. I was going off on how excruciating it was to get back into the swing of fashion, fitness and feeling like myself after giving birth! I was rambling on about how fat and ugly I felt and I realized that I was NOT helping and maybe sounding a bit too vain. So, after we hung up....I wrote her this letter. I then became worried about all of the friends I have joked with about (or thought we were joking about) appearances and fashion in MOTHERHOOD. Perhaps I have sounded or come off too negative! So, to ALL of my Buddies...I am sorry if I came off wrong......this is what I really mean when I talk Fashion, Fitness, and Feeling Fabulous.......
Dear Friend.....
I really hope that my comments today didn't leave you thinking that I have some crazy egocentric view of the Universe....Those comments truly are in a joking context and are simply made to make myself feel better about the haggard and frumpy little housewife that I've become. It is true that I LOVE fashion and can only dream of being a fabulous beauty, but the truth is that I am fully aware that my reality is far from being anything close to fab. Also, When I was saying that I felt like there are "certain people" I can joke that way with, I meant people who I deem prettier than myself...or more fashionable than I am....These are the ones who can laugh at my silly sad little self and find it unoffensive! This is why I feel comfortable making those statements to you! :) I assume that you just shake your head and chuckle with pity for my sad attempts to look a bit less like the frazzled mommy who I am. YOU however, are actually one of those Mom's that everyone in town comments on about being TOO perfect, too gorgeous, too often! (Comments of jealousy)
Anyway, I have been joking this way with you for some time now and I hope that all of this time you haven't thought of me as a vain and arrogant friend. I guess I figure that If I am the first one to say it, then others understand that I am self aware and trying!--that I am NOT unknowingly going down the fashion drain! So, does that clear things up? Does that make any more sense? So, bottom line....the gist of it....***I KNOW that I am no longer hip, not sure if I ever really was, but can only hope/dream for someday! (maybe my thirties)...if it isn't too late because of a body sacrifice for babies.
Oh, and I am sorry about my insensitivity to age as well. I think being married to an older man has left me a bit desensitized to the subject! I feel like anyone over the age of 25 is the same. And honestly, I forget that you aren't my very own age! You seem (and Look) like you are 26 as well. So, if I ever accidentally make an age remark that stings, just know that I think of you as not possibly a day over thirty...and because of how great you look, you are immune to any age comments. However, because I am now experiencing the effects of age and the giant factor it plays by way of appearances, you may want to start reminding me of yours in conversation! It always makes me admire you EVEN MORE so when you politely remind me that not only do you look better than me, but that you do it with a couple years on me!
I think this is the silliest email I have ever written! I just want you to know that I think of you as one of my very best friends. I feel like I can tell you anything, turn to you for help, and hang out and laugh harder than ever with you! Thank you for being so wonderful to me. Always. We continuously wind up having passion for all of the same things, and we have so much in common. It is always great to look into your eyes and know that you TRULY understand. I haven't forgotten all that you have done for me. I hope that I can return your many favors. We better be close friends forever, because that is how long it will take! You have too many points on me! Please call me when you need help....and that is not an 'if you need help'....you will need it! (Note the Warning!) Please think to call me. It would truly be my pleasure. Oh, and consider the preschool for your 2 year old...If your husband drags his feet about it, have him call me up and I will SELL IT! ;)
Love you, see you tomorrow!
Kate
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If only I could post a picture of myself (in comments) after I had my 3rd baby and gained 55 pounds. You would all think I was wearing a fat suit under my frump-o-la, baggy, out-of-style clothes that were all I could squeeze myself into. I am glad that your kindred knew just what you meant by it all before you even explained it. We post-baby fatties have to laugh together to endure our feelings of ugliness. That was nice of you to write that letter. We all know who you are, Katie. You don't have to explain yourself. But I could have used you around 21 months ago to boost me up. The babies are worth every pound of it, aren't they?
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